I’ve recently realised that I’ve been a bit guilty of being too “busy”. I came to this realisation after listening to one of Tim Ferriss’s podcast where he played a chapter titled Lazy: A manifesto out of Tim Kreider’s book called We Learnt Nothing.
I was listening to that podcast on a ride home after attending a casual event hosted by the Tassie Girl Geek Coffees. I almost didn’t go to that event because I could have been busy improving myself by listening to another lecture on Udemy, and socialising doesn’t come easy for me, so I would have rather taken the easy option and have some alone time.
Sometimes I think that I’ve overcame my sort of social anxiety, especially when meeting new people, but then I have these hesitations about going for social events come up from time to time. I was telling myself I wouldn’t be comfortable there because I wasn’t “geeky” enough – I didn’t know much about web development yet to use as a conversation topic etc. Bullshit like that. I decided to shut off the voice of doubt in my head because it was silly to be afraid of people. Isn’t it essentially that? Why am I afraid of people? There are more things to be afraid of than humans. So I went, and I’m glad I did.
I surprised myself, I was able to communicate quite comfortably with strangers. Towards the end of the event I played Super Mario Smash Brothers on the Wii with 3 other people. I haven’t touched a video game controller for so long, and it felt unusual playing video games in Tassie.
Ever since I first arrived in Tasmania, my lifestyle has drastically change. While I was still doing my undergrad, I always felt like I should be busy working on some uni assignment, or revising. Of course I procrastinated and took time off to enjoy the outdoors, but I usually felt a bit guilty. I can’t remember if I ever had to rush an assignment because I always aimed to be consistent with work and not leave things to the last minute, but I also didn’t regularly let myself chill out without guilt. Thinking back, when I was still schooling in Singapore, I would play video games till 2-3 am without the tiniest sense of guilt even though I had not finished my homework (hmm, can being so immersed in a video game be considered living in the moment?). I managed to balance schoolwork and leisure activities enough to be an average or slightly above average student, though I probably could have done more useful things with my time, self-improvement wise, but I did turn out to be a pretty conscious person.
My point is, I know life is a marathon, and consistency is key, but I should also allow myself to have well-deserved mental breaks, i.e. be in the moment, enjoy the moment, focus on one thing at a time – if I’m doing jiu jitsu now, just think about jiu jitsu, if I’m having lunch, just appreciate your food, if I feel like taking photos of succulents in the garden, appreciate the small details, and don’t worry about all the other things you have to do.
That being said, I do get overwhelmed when I sometimes think about all the things I have to do, and then I feel like I can’t relax until I get all of them done. But sometimes things are out of your control, e.g. when you have to wait on your supervisor’s to respond to your emails, so I just gotta go with the flow. From what people have told me and the things I’ve read, it’s all about accomplishing small goals that eventually make up the sum of the large one. I found this quote I heard from a guest on Tim Ferriss’s podcast really poignant: Aim to be a B+ average. It’s much better to get a B+ all year round than to always aim for an A+ and totally give up when you fail to achieve it (but don’t tell that to asian parents…).
Alright I think that’s all for now. Peace.